FOMO as a timeline problem, not a motivation problem, lands hard. I like the idea of treating it as information instead of something to outrun or suppress. The prompt creates just enough distance to interrupt the reflex without over-intellectualizing it.
Slowing the moment before choice is underrated. Alignment beats urgency every time.
Exactly, Kay, that’s the shift we were hoping to make visible. Treating FOMO as information rather than a motivator changes how you respond. Slowing the moment before choice really does give space for alignment to take over, instead of reflex or rush. Have you noticed moments where stepping back like this revealed something you might have missed if you’d just reacted?
I’m so glad you find it useful! That’s the beauty of Substack a place to exchange knowledge and experiences and grow together.
Thanks Kay, I'm so glad that you agree. This is exactly why we need to slow down our interactions because that alignment is something that helps us to become more whole as humans, which then ultimately results in more effective workplace behaviours as well.
Thank you for sharing your article, Discern first captures the same pause we’re exploring here, the moment where urgency loosens enough for clarity to come through. I’m glad this conversation is unfolding in parallel. Thank you again for weaving this in.
That’s wonderful, Jessica! I’m so glad it sparked your curiosity 🙌🏼. Can’t wait to hear what shows up for you when you try it even small pauses can reveal surprising clarity.
I used to like to imagine myself as a lady in Flatland, that is to say, a line in 2d space, appearing only as a point when viewed head on. I imagined this because I thought it would help me cut directly through any type of curvature, chaos or complex systems, and get straight to the point faster than people who get caught up going in circles. That is the fast route. But one must be extremely sure of one's orientation, objectives and destination before heading there.
I am not quite sure I have achieved 'lady' status in any dimension! I worry that my linearity would just look like planar spread in a higher dimension, and even less ladylike, however, in a curved spacetime the possibilities are manifold.
Thanks James, is it possible to be in more than one of these voices at once? As I definitely feel myself connected to the nature and creative in this instance.
Yes 😊 We have access to all 5 voices … however we do tend to have a foundation voice that we see the others through … take the assessment - 10mins /15 tops and let me know 😊
Something I'm always struck by Sam is how. you not only bring us great ideas to be considered with your essays, but you are continuously inviting us to expand our world by the connections to other great voices you share here on Substack. I'm excited to explore Farida's writing more as I always do after reading your collaborative posts!
You don't need special tools or training, just whatever AI you already have access to and a willingness to slow down. The prompt is clear, the instructions are specific, and you've included a real example so people can see what it might look like. That's thoughtful design.
Thank you, Neela. We cared a lot about keeping this usable in real life, no special setup, just a willingness to pause. I’m glad the prompt and example made the intention clear. That kind of accessibility is part of the work.
Thank you Sam, for giving me the opportunity to share and spread the knowledge for best AI use
I really like the idea of using AI as a mirror to catch the things we're too close to see. We usually treat these tools as accelerators to help us go faster, but using them as a handbrake to actually figure out why we're rushing is a much more interesting use case.
Exactly, Sharyph, I love that framing: AI as a handbrake rather than just an accelerator. It shifts the conversation from “how fast can I go?” to “why am I moving this way?” Curious, have you noticed moments when slowing down with AI revealed something about your own patterns or priorities?
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Thank you, JHong! Love the energy and yes, JOMO is such a wonderful counterpoint to FOMO. It’s funny how choosing what not to chase can be just as powerful as chasing something new. Curious, have you noticed moments where leaning into JOMO revealed unexpected clarity or space in your day?
No I love JOMO. At least in my reading of it. It’s having boundaries, finding the joy in not participating in something. If there’s joy in the missing, it was probably not meant to be attended :)
Ahhhhh'! I totally misread that. I thought (and in hindsight this was foolish of me) that JOMO was about the fear of missing out in the JOY of participating. Now I know exactly what you mean and 💯 agree! Total Joy in missing out on late night drinking sessions for me! 😅
During pandemic days we were forced to miss out. There were certainly events that we missed. But then there were ones that were likely “busy for busy sake.” It’s akin to the joy one feel’s when an event is canceled. Ahhhhh.
I like the shift from "What am I missing?" to "What does this urgency reveal about what I value?". It transforms anxiety into a diagnostic tool. Very interesting post.
Thank you, Anastasia! I love how you put that turning urgency into a diagnostic tool is exactly the kind of shift that makes FOMO useful rather than overwhelming. Curious have you tried noticing what that kind of reflection reveals in your own decisions?
I tried this prompt across a couple of threads, and this is one of the steps it returned:
(not just about what I decide, but about how I need to think before deciding)
"Before you post anything else—whether it's tomorrow or next week—pause and ask yourself: Does this feel like me showing up, or does this feel like me adjusting to someone else's tempo?"Then post only what passes that test. Not to prove you're unbothered, but to practice choosing from your own center rather than in reaction to perceived criticism."
Pretty cool. The distinction between "me showing up" and "adjusting to someone else's tempo" gives me a way to check in with myself that feels both grounding and clarifying.
That’s beautiful, Anastasia, I love that distinction too. “Showing up” versus “adjusting to someone else’s tempo” really captures the heart of choosing from your own center. Pausing in that way creates space to respond with alignment instead of reflex.
Thank you Anastasia. I've also found this prompt to be really useful in helping me to align what actually matters to me with what I think others assume to be important.
Exactly, Hodman, that pause is where clarity shows up. AI isn’t just speeding things along it can give a moment to notice what you actually want before the pressure takes over.
FOMO as a timeline problem, not a motivation problem, lands hard. I like the idea of treating it as information instead of something to outrun or suppress. The prompt creates just enough distance to interrupt the reflex without over-intellectualizing it.
Slowing the moment before choice is underrated. Alignment beats urgency every time.
Exactly, Kay, that’s the shift we were hoping to make visible. Treating FOMO as information rather than a motivator changes how you respond. Slowing the moment before choice really does give space for alignment to take over, instead of reflex or rush. Have you noticed moments where stepping back like this revealed something you might have missed if you’d just reacted?
I’m so glad you find it useful! That’s the beauty of Substack a place to exchange knowledge and experiences and grow together.
Thanks Kay, I'm so glad that you agree. This is exactly why we need to slow down our interactions because that alignment is something that helps us to become more whole as humans, which then ultimately results in more effective workplace behaviours as well.
We're working with this a lot right now, and just wrote about that end of it a few days ago. https://theweavingfield.substack.com/p/fomo-discern-first
Welcome to drop a link to this in comments there :)
Thank you for sharing your article, Discern first captures the same pause we’re exploring here, the moment where urgency loosens enough for clarity to come through. I’m glad this conversation is unfolding in parallel. Thank you again for weaving this in.
Thanks Joanne. I'll give this a read now.
Since a few years, I enjoy my own company so much that I don't experience FOMO anymore :-)
That is a very healthy way of looking at it, Nazanin. 🙏
That sounds like a real kind of freedom 🙂 When your own company feels sufficient, there’s much less to miss. - I stand in your camp 😍
Same here 🙌🏼🎯💯
Can’t wait to try out this new prompt! Thank you, Dr. Sam and Farida!! 🙌🏼🫶🏼
That’s wonderful, Jessica! I’m so glad it sparked your curiosity 🙌🏼. Can’t wait to hear what shows up for you when you try it even small pauses can reveal surprising clarity.
Thanks so much Jess. It has been a brilliant prompt that Farida worked up.
The risk isn’t emotional relief, it’s agency displacement. Once tools regulate feelings, decision ownership quietly follows. :)
well said Mandhir, I agree with you
Absolutely, the loss of agency is what worries me most about our ever-increasing reliance on AI tools.
I used to like to imagine myself as a lady in Flatland, that is to say, a line in 2d space, appearing only as a point when viewed head on. I imagined this because I thought it would help me cut directly through any type of curvature, chaos or complex systems, and get straight to the point faster than people who get caught up going in circles. That is the fast route. But one must be extremely sure of one's orientation, objectives and destination before heading there.
That's a great observation Alice. Do you feel like a lady living in the third or fourth dimension these days?
I am not quite sure I have achieved 'lady' status in any dimension! I worry that my linearity would just look like planar spread in a higher dimension, and even less ladylike, however, in a curved spacetime the possibilities are manifold.
This article comes at the perfect time! Even in Pilate, I sometimes feel the rush. 'Slow AI' for calmer decisions? So smart. Love this.
Happy it resonated with you.
Thanks Roxy! Slow AI with Pilates, that is definitely something I need to think about.
Just tried out the prompt for my most recent chat and my FOMO is that I’m afraid of losing directional confidence.
Thanks Tope. Does that resonate with what you identify yourself? I totally get why losing that kind of confidence would be challenging.
Yes it does. It picked up questions I constantly ask and gave me one step to do. Write about patterns I noticed without giving it any interpretations.
I’ll come back here to let you know how the exercise goes but I’m eager to try it out.
Happy it helped. Now you should ask the right questions on how to focus on your directional confidence and stay grounded
Many people don’t fear missing opportunities as much as missing meaning.
FOMO shows up differently across the voices:
Nurturers worry about letting people down.
Guardians fear getting it wrong or falling behind standards.
Creatives feel pulled by too many interesting paths.
Connectors feel the pressure of what others are choosing.
Pioneers feel urgency to move before clarity arrives.
Naming these patterns already lowers the noise.
It feels like standing at a busy junction with every light flashing green.
Movement is possible, but direction still matters.
Thanks James, is it possible to be in more than one of these voices at once? As I definitely feel myself connected to the nature and creative in this instance.
Yes 😊 We have access to all 5 voices … however we do tend to have a foundation voice that we see the others through … take the assessment - 10mins /15 tops and let me know 😊
https://jamesbarringer.giantos.com/store/5-voices
Fascinating. But I feel that way about most of your work. I'm really thinking about technology in a new way.
Thanks April. That is really lovely to hear. 🙏
Something I'm always struck by Sam is how. you not only bring us great ideas to be considered with your essays, but you are continuously inviting us to expand our world by the connections to other great voices you share here on Substack. I'm excited to explore Farida's writing more as I always do after reading your collaborative posts!
Thank you Phil , nice to e-meet you
you too @Farida Khalaf ❤️
Thanks Phil! You will LOVE Farida's work. I do not say this lightly, but she is one of the smartest people on this whole platform. 🙏
Thank you Sam for the opportunity and your kind words
❤️
excited to dig in more then!
What makes this work is its accessibility.
You don't need special tools or training, just whatever AI you already have access to and a willingness to slow down. The prompt is clear, the instructions are specific, and you've included a real example so people can see what it might look like. That's thoughtful design.
Thank you, Sam & Farida!
Thank you, Neela. We cared a lot about keeping this usable in real life, no special setup, just a willingness to pause. I’m glad the prompt and example made the intention clear. That kind of accessibility is part of the work.
Thank you Sam, for giving me the opportunity to share and spread the knowledge for best AI use
Thanks so much Neela, this is how I hope we can really help people to use their AI tools more effectively. 🙏
I really like the idea of using AI as a mirror to catch the things we're too close to see. We usually treat these tools as accelerators to help us go faster, but using them as a handbrake to actually figure out why we're rushing is a much more interesting use case.
Exactly, Sharyph, I love that framing: AI as a handbrake rather than just an accelerator. It shifts the conversation from “how fast can I go?” to “why am I moving this way?” Curious, have you noticed moments when slowing down with AI revealed something about your own patterns or priorities?
I am a big fan of your content, you are the king of SEO, happy to know it resonated with you
Thanks Sharyph. I agree. Farida's prompt really helps us to focus on this. 🙏
Love seeing two favorites combine their powers!
And here's a vote for JOMO. The joy of missing out. Identified during the pandemic, but here to stay.
Thank you, JHong! Love the energy and yes, JOMO is such a wonderful counterpoint to FOMO. It’s funny how choosing what not to chase can be just as powerful as chasing something new. Curious, have you noticed moments where leaning into JOMO revealed unexpected clarity or space in your day?
JOMO helps you focus and align with your goals
It came up on another note but I think it all boils down to discernment.
Spending more time up front on what/whom to give energy.
Truth be told it doesn’t feel like so much of a “miss out,” more like a strategic choice :)
Joy Of Choosing Intelligently? JOCI? Hahaha.
Yes to JOCI! Also JJHong for obvious reasons. ⭐️
Haha to be totally accurate it should be NJHong. My chinese name (middle name) actually translates to New Joy.
Yes! Total NJHong! 🤩
Love it .. JOCI , this should be the smart choice
Oh my, JOMO is so upsetting. Way worse than FOMO as it has a real tactility and presence to it as well. 😢
No I love JOMO. At least in my reading of it. It’s having boundaries, finding the joy in not participating in something. If there’s joy in the missing, it was probably not meant to be attended :)
Ahhhhh'! I totally misread that. I thought (and in hindsight this was foolish of me) that JOMO was about the fear of missing out in the JOY of participating. Now I know exactly what you mean and 💯 agree! Total Joy in missing out on late night drinking sessions for me! 😅
During pandemic days we were forced to miss out. There were certainly events that we missed. But then there were ones that were likely “busy for busy sake.” It’s akin to the joy one feel’s when an event is canceled. Ahhhhh.
I like the shift from "What am I missing?" to "What does this urgency reveal about what I value?". It transforms anxiety into a diagnostic tool. Very interesting post.
Thank you, Anastasia! I love how you put that turning urgency into a diagnostic tool is exactly the kind of shift that makes FOMO useful rather than overwhelming. Curious have you tried noticing what that kind of reflection reveals in your own decisions?
I tried this prompt across a couple of threads, and this is one of the steps it returned:
(not just about what I decide, but about how I need to think before deciding)
"Before you post anything else—whether it's tomorrow or next week—pause and ask yourself: Does this feel like me showing up, or does this feel like me adjusting to someone else's tempo?"Then post only what passes that test. Not to prove you're unbothered, but to practice choosing from your own center rather than in reaction to perceived criticism."
Pretty cool. The distinction between "me showing up" and "adjusting to someone else's tempo" gives me a way to check in with myself that feels both grounding and clarifying.
That’s beautiful, Anastasia, I love that distinction too. “Showing up” versus “adjusting to someone else’s tempo” really captures the heart of choosing from your own center. Pausing in that way creates space to respond with alignment instead of reflex.
I am happy your find it useful
Thanks, Farida!
Thank you Anastasia. I've also found this prompt to be really useful in helping me to align what actually matters to me with what I think others assume to be important.
Using AI to create a pause when you feel that pressure to jump at something helps you figure out what you actually want, instead of just reacting.
Exactly, Hodman, that pause is where clarity shows up. AI isn’t just speeding things along it can give a moment to notice what you actually want before the pressure takes over.
Exactly Hodman. It ca be the perfect circuit breaker if we let it. 🙏